Health & Fitness
A Father’s Day Reflection on Mortality
The birth of a child can bring thoughts and emotions you never thought possible. This Father's Day, Darren reflects on his first thought and how it changed his perspective to say the least.
As a 24-year-old Air Force veteran and husband, I remember thinking about how basically I would live for eternity because it was taking so long to turn 25 and receive that auto-insurance discount. To that point, I felt invincible. There was nothing I couldn’t do and no person could ever stop me. Then, it happened.
My daughter, Daryan, was born a healthy 3lbs 15oz preemie nearly five weeks early. In my total ignorance, I never really thought anything of her being born early and the complications coming early can bring. I remember the neonatologist picking her scrawny body up and thinking how much she reminded me of a baby pterodactyl; the cutest pterodactyl ever born, but a pterodactyl none-the-less.
I just remember taking life as it came, because I was indestructible and this was just life. Due to her premature status in a doll-sized diaper, we didn’t get a chance to hold her right away, which was okay for me. How could anyone hold someone so tiny anyways?
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Then, about two to six hours later (time tends to move between 1 and 300 second minutes during times like this), we were allowed to hold our first baby. At that moment I looked into her adorable face, head full of black hair, beautiful brown eyes, itty-bitty lips and thought, “Wow, I can die.”
Trust me, this wasn't something I'd expected either.
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It goes without saying, this was such a humbling revelation for me. I know what some of you are thinking, “How is it possible he really didn’t think he was mortal?” However, I really didn’t think about life in that way. When you’re a young man, you think life lasts forever. In jest, my great-grandparents and Moses could have been school mates for all I knew. My oldest sister was pushing 40 and I thought she was ancient. Evidently, my mental maturity wasn’t quite attuned. Then, the little girl changed that whole perspective.
Fourteen years later, I reflect on that moment with awe and respect. Now I know how much responsibility I signed up for and scary the possibility of screwing up another life can weigh on you. However, I welcome the change and enjoy the journey. Father’s Day is a special time for me because I know it is such a privilege to be a dad, even if it means the realization of mortality. Happy Father's Day to all of my fellow mortals!
Follow me on twitter @darrenthedad or send comments to darrenthedad@gmail.com.
